Trouble Sleeping.

Tonight, I am having trouble sleeping and am haunted by my constant mistakes and mess-ups. I begin to wonder and question myself of what is going on? Life has been amazing and God has been the most real He has ever been to me. I just don’t know what I am thinking or how to explain it. If you are reading this, you are giving this attention and could be attracted to what is on my mind.

Why is it that whenever you have these “highs” with God and being lifted up to these positions that people look up to you in a Spiritual Leader role, that is when it is the toughest? I believe that Satan is trying to discourage me from shining God’s light.

Though I find myself dry and lost,
I view myself as a lost cause,
However, I know that it is darkness haunting me,
The deceiver of truth and the king of falsity,
I know that God is near,
Through this time, He is here.

I know that trusting Him has lead me to where I am,
He works all things for the good of me and who I am,
He sees who I can be,
He sees where I can go,
He knows everything about me,
He is here when I am lost and alone,
He knows my ups and my downs,
He has seen my smiles and my frowns,
He knows my downfalls and my abilities,
He has conquered death, which is the highest feat,
I am reminded of this and it is Him that I seek,
Lord, take over my life and use me for your glory,
I want to be reach others with my story,
Lead me in your path and set my feet straight,
For I know that my life has great fate,
I know that God is near,
Through this time, He is here.
Find me.

For those who are like me and sometimes finding yourself in discouragement on random nights, simply begin to write out your thoughts and how you are confused. I do believe that through this experience, God will find you and lead you back to His grace and His path. I know that He is near and that He cares for those who seek Him out. Seek Him out and He will find you.

God is good.